Why Your Goals Won’t Fulfil You

 Generally we go through life and think that if only life was easier… if only everyone saw and did things our way… that the world would be some kind of paradise. This is a mistake based on the idea that if the world matched up to your Should Vision it would be perfect. This is a mistake because the information that makes up your Should Vision is mistaken, false and incomplete.

First think about this. What would be your idea of Paradise?

The most common vision seems to involve lying in a hammock on the most beautiful beach… having the tastiest foods and drink fed to you by the most attractive waiting staff. Every material possession only has to be reached for and everyone agrees. There are no conflicts.

 When you’re feeling bruised and sore… when life seems too frantic and too harsh… this vision seems more and more seductive. Yet this wish is just as flawed as King Midas’s wish to turn everything he touched into Gold.

It would take only a few days to get bored with living the same day over and over again. Which is what this vision would be.

We do not really want everyone to agree with us. We only want to be able to get along with each other even if we disagree. We don’t want everything to just fall in our laps. We just want to know that we can steer our lives in the right direction.

If you look at every aspect of life you can see that there is never an end. There is no perfection, because with every improvement there are always further possibilities. Life is the game that never ends. The Universe expands with every breath. Each Creature evolves into an ever more complex and sophisticated version.

As a society we expand from disharmony. Not the kind of destructive disharmony that creates war and destruction. But the kind of disharmony that leads to progress. The disharmony that turns conventional wisdom on its head. This kind of creative friction is the force of progress and evolution. It is this that forces our Society to expand to include new ideas.

When there is just one idea that everyone agrees with. There is harmony. It could also be called a trap. When there are two or more ideas you have the ability to exercise free will and direct your own life. Wherever there are two or more ideas there is also the possibility to synthesize the two and create new ideas. The more ideas there are; the more possibilities open up.

The problem is that we have always had a tendency to mistake others for their ideas. Rather than separating the person from the idea and feeling harmonious with the person, but not necessarily the idea… we feel that it is offensive to contradict someone. Therefore we don’t.

However by superficially agreeing, even when we don’t, we create a split deep inside of us. The split grows into a chasm and causes us to feel frustration. This creates a resentment against the other – for no other reason than that our pretence has made us feel bad. Then when we feel sufficiently angry we’ll snap. But by now as we have identified the person as being tied to the idea we now experience disharmony with the individual, rather than the idea.

It is all based on a fundamental misunderstanding. People are not the ideas that they speak. Any idea spoken is just a snapshot of that person’s thoughts. Now it is true, that due to economy of thought, many people in our world do not pay much attention to the ideas they hold and so don’t change them very often. However the person is still not the idea. Yet our Operating System using as little mental energy as possible sometimes does link them in together.

If we free ourselves from this mental shortcut we are able to discuss ideas freely without offence. This is the greatest way that we can evolve. By sharing ideas and putting together all the pieces together in our own way to create our own picture. When we are able to truly share our thoughts and ideas without fear of offending others than we are able to find ourselves. Read on to find out why…